The Anti-diet

When a teenager has to cook for herself, she more than often settles with something dull and boring such as noodles, sandwiches or simply nothing. I myself enjoy cooking a whole lot; especially when with someone (a great way to impress an over-night guest is to make him/her a nice breakfast). In this article, I will share with you the skills on how to cook a meal worthy a cowboy – a meal that will give you the strength of a grizzly, the reflexes of a puma, and the wisdom of a man. The dish is popular among the staff of The Bladins Times and occurs frequently at our editorial staff meetings.

Components for 1-2 portions:
• 1-2 cans of Heinz Baked Beans in tomato sauce
• 1 package of sausage of your choice (preferably bratwurst, chorizo or txistorra etc.)
• 1-2 packages of bacon
• 2-4 regular toast breads
• Butter

Beverages
Depending on what time of the day it is, you might choose different beverages, but coffee should always be included.
• Orange juice (with pulp)
• Coffee (steaming hot, no milk, no sugar)
• Beer
• Whiskey

Soundtrack
Artists worth listening to while making this dish are the likes of Bob Dylan, Neil Young, Bruce Springsteen, Johnny Cash and/or basically any good bluegrass band. If you are not capable of finding these artists on your own, I here present the perfect playlist for the undertaking: The Anti-Diet – The Playlist

Track Listing:

  1. Il Bueno, Il Cattivo, Il Brutto – Ennio Morricone
  2. Southern Pacific – Neil Young
  3. I’m On Fire (Live) – Bruce Springsteen
  4. Dueling Banjos – Eric Weissberg & Deliverance
  5. Hard Times In New York Town (Live Broadcasting) – Bob Dylan
  6. Rebels – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
  7. San Quentin (Live) – Johnny Cash
  8. State Trooper – Bruce Springsteen
  9. Bleecker Street – Simon & Garfunkel
  10. L’Arena – Ennio Morricone

The Process
1. Start of by putting on the coffee and open all cans and packages. Slice the bacon on the middle and cut the sausages in pieces of three. Cut the crusts of the toast bread so that they have the shape of perfect squares.
2. Fry the bacon in a regular frying pan. Only you know how you like your bacon, but make sure to let the pieces circulate in the pan a lot so that they don’t stick. When ready, put the bacon on a folded newspaper with kitchen paper on top for it to get rid of possible extra fat.
3. Empty the pan of grease and fry the cut up sausages under constant movement until to give it a nice finish.
4. Put the baked beans in a pot and boil under constant stirring. Melt a lot (a lot) of butter in the pan, put the toast bread on and let each side of it absorb butter. Fry for about one minute on each side and put in on the newspaper where the bacon should be ready by then.
5. Serve while warm and enjoy!

/Jesper Sjödahl

 

 

Plus toast and sausages.

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